Oh, so that's what I've missed out on....

I came across this article: 23 Things to do Instead of Getting Engaged when you're 23, and could not believe what I was reading.

I laughed! Out loud. And scoffed and rolled my eyes and snorted from disbelief.

And because I'm feeling especially snarky today and particularly proud of my marriage, I must add my commentary to this article.

 

23 Things to do Instead of Getting Engaged when you're 23

1. Get a passport. Wait. Can a married person not get a passport anymore?! I just renewed my passport. Did I just do something illegal?? I'll probably go to prison now, great. Looks like we won't be going to Brazil this December like we planned, darn you marriage! Now I can't travel internationally, grrrr.

2. Find your "thing." Really. Can you only "find your 'thing'" once you're 23? I didn't know it was a coming of age sort of deal. Does that mean gymnastics and coaching are no longer "my thing"? What about the "thing's" I've found while married? Like gardening and hiking and sex? I enjoy all those "things".

4. Adopt a pet. But what if my complex doesn't allow pets? So now I have to move. Also, what if I'm allergic? No, a naked mole rat or hairless cat are NOT an option.

5. Start a band. You don't want to hear me sing. I promise. But I can play the piano so maybe we wouldn't be too shabby...

6. Make a cake. If only I had baked a cake while single... now I'll never get to since I'm married. Woe is me.

7. Get a tattoo. It's more permanent than a marriage. My marriage is eternal, so sorry to bust your bubble but it's totally more permanent that your tattoos. Besides, I'm more of a temporary tattoo kind of girl.

8. Explore a new religion. There's always more to learn in my religion, so I'd rather continue to explore mine. Studying other religions is very fascinating and enlightening though, so I'll give you that.

9. Start a small business. My future consists of personal training and possibly massage, so owning my own business is right up my alley.

10. Cut your hair. Oh no I got married so now I can't cut my hair anymore! I better find a friend who can replicate that Rapunzel braid, cause I'm gonna need it.

11. Date two people at once and see how long it takes to blow up in your face. Why are you encouraging people to emotionally damage others? I'm sure if you found out your boyfriend was chea-- ahem. I mean "Dating two people at once" you wouldn't pat him on the back and say, "oh I understand! I'm glad you saw my list on how to live it up when you're 23 instead of getting married."

12. Build something with your hands. Luckily my siblings and I were very involved with Home Depot's Free Kid's Workshops. I've made all sorts of things!

13. Accomplish a Pinterest project. Been there, done that. And I've done dozens more since I got married, thank you.

14. Join the Peace Corps. Those who do are held in great respect, but why not double the fun and have you AND your spouse join? Then you're BOTH admirable.

15. Disappoint your parents. That what your teenage years are for.

16. Watch Girls, over and over again. Not my kind of entertainment. I'm more of a Bones, NCIS, Doctor Who kind of girl.

17. Eat a jar of Nutella in one sitting. The Personal Trainer side of me is cringing, but only because I am not only capable of doing so, but willing to as well.

18. Make strangers feel uncomfortable in public places. I do that naturally, it's called my "personality".

19. Sign up for CrossFit. ABSOLUTELY NOT. CrossFit is one of the worst ways to get in shape, and one of the best ways to injure yourself. Check out what Erin Simmons, who has a Masters and is currently working on her PhD, has to say about CrossFit.

20. Hangout naked in front of a window. This was a normal thing for me, in fact, running around outside completely naked was a regular activity...when I was 2. Not anymore, sorry.

21. Write your feelings down in a blog. That is exactly what I am doing right now. One step ahead of ya, sister.

22. Be selfish. Oh look! You just so happened to list the reason people a) Don't get married and b) Marriages fail.

23. Come with me to the Philippines for Chinese New Year. One question, can I bring my husband along??